“Rooney”-esque… TWO

Future rights of Summer.

Future rights of Summer.

Here we are at a yet, and still, eternal season of “The SUN”. The Maple trees have already dropped their first set of “Helicopters” for the ensuing generation, as the Crocus, Daffodils and Iris have recreated their ground “buntings” across most yards above the Equator.

Volunteer “grounds crews” are prepping Wallace, Chip, Shinichi, and Willamina’s “BALL” fields, be they Base, Soft, or Soccer/ Foot, (International terminology.). Now’s the actuality of the ageless rhyme of: “April showers…”, and the “coming of age” responsibility of caring for that plot of designer “grasslands” commonly known as a “LAWN”.

Ever since the descendants of Europeans felt the visual tug of Mr. Scotts’ “craft”, ( Scotts TURF=Golf courses.), the American “HOMEOWNER”, ( American WHAT !?!), has attempted to achieve the visually artistic presentations of various flora since SERFDOM. And, as we are now, the combined generations of [agrarian], [industrial], and [technological] “ages” isn’t it interesting that the indoctrination of terminology has described a MACHINE as the primary of keeping the various types of “grass” at a visually securing, humanly traffic-able height. LAWN MOWER= “To lop something flat”.

The “LAWN MOWER”, walked behind, hand held, ridden, (like any of PATTON’S tanks of WW2!!!), and now ‘GPS’ guided while one sits on the VERANDA. From the gear-driven, revolving “scissors” of a “REEL” type to the small-engined “walk-behind” types of the 20th century…

... to today

... to today.

Those who had enough of those BILLIONS of soft CHLOROFYLLED blades have sought to “tame” it. And, as they may have also been successful at “continuing the ‘species'”, begun the lessons of its “proper” care, (AND FEEDING.), to their sprouting “half-clones”. Just before the “State” mandated education period comes to its yearly close these young folks begin their hourly exercise of futility, turning the toe-caps of $100 (plus) footwear into any shade of FESCUE, or KENTUCKY BLUE… Upset that they will be found out as a “CHORE” doer, instead of having the parentage that “CATERS” to THEM.

It’s funny that these youngsters view these machines as “cumbersome”… it’s not like they HAVE to shear, milk, or scoop-up after the “lawnmowers” of yesteryear. ALL of the “Lawnmowers” gone by had to be taken care of in similar fashion as us… MAMMALS… HERBIVORES. each eats the various grasses to various heights according to lips and teeth, very much like the tools of a Barber, or Beautician, to “GROOM”* the types of “blades” of our own “micro-lawns”, (HAIR!). Thus the NATURAL term . For this mechanical task shouldn’t what we do be called… “VROOMING”* the LAWN?




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